There are these little moments where I wonder, “how much is too much to share?” But those moments don’t last long, because our fragrant community isn’t just a bunch of random strangers excitedly sounding off about whatever yummy thing they’re smelling (although that’s part of it), but a genuine community of friends threaded together by our common love. We are a smart, savvy group; we are generous and thoughtful, we are perfumistas.
When I came to this coven of enthusiasts, I was delighted by the warmth, and the depth of friendship that I found with my fellow bloggers and perfume lovers. It has meant the world to me. I’ve been through many personal milestones since Beauty on The Outside began over four years ago: I finished a Bachelor’s degree, I got married, I moved from Oregon to Texas. Life lies in between the major plot points, and it’s those in-between places that are filled with the daily pleasures of fragrance, and my fragrant friends. A major plot twist has occurred in my life, and the perfumistas have extended their love and support from every corner of the earth. How can I measure what this is worth?
It wasn’t many posts ago that I asked for your help in selecting a birthday fragrance for Matt, and now I’m here to tell you that we’re getting divorced. Divorce is heart-breaking, no matter the circumstances, but I am fortunate that ours is mostly amicable. Love may cover a multitude of sins, but it doesn’t cover incompatibility. After 7.5 years together, we’re giving peace a chance, and moving our relationship from marital to platonic. We are hopeful for ourselves and for each other, optimistic for the future.
And what has perfume to do with this? Perfume has been a journey for me, a journey of self-discovery and self-expression. Exploring themes of identity, of pleasure, of hope, and even fear, I found that it’s hard to ignore incompatibility when you are constantly working to open yourself up to feeling, to fully explore the what, why, and how, of your emotions. Just as a painting might speak to you a thousand words, a perfume might speak to you a thousand more.
My transition hasn’t been easy (thus my long radio silence), and there is still a rough road ahead. But I’m here, and I’m grateful that you are too.