Things I Hate: Serge Lutens Louve

Does Louve really smell like Zombies? Well, probably not. But if Stephanie Meyer wrote a book about an angsty teenage girl who fell in love with a handsome, centuries old, likewise angsty boy Zombie, this is the perfume said girl would wear.

The first time I tried Louve, it was evening, before bed. I remember swiping several passes of the applicator wand across my left wrist, then gently pressing it into my right. My immediate response, before effecting Wrist-To-Nose, was pleasant. I had high hopes for this perfume, despite the following review from Turin:

Louve starts with an audaciously intense morello cherry note that forces one to think of a Cherry Coke cocktail (such things apparently exist, perish the thought). The cherry transitions to a strange soapy heliotropin accord with wet-sawdust undertones, more akin to the smell of a confined space in which perfumes are stored that of a deliberate mix. Neither very good nor very bad, but completely baffling.
—Luca Turin, Perfumes the A-Z Guide

Occasionally a bad review piques my interest more than a glowing review, because I just want to know.

It was with a spirit of adventure that I boldly applied Louve, and, as I said above, the first seconds after application were pleasant. Immediately and violently followed by sticky cherry cough-syrup, with a mountain of sugar on top. Horrible! Horrible! Horrible!

While I planned to try Louve again before posting this draft, in an attempt to say something bordering on intelligent, I just don’t have the strength.
You might as well ask me to sit through the new Twilight movie, whatever it is.

17 thoughts on “Things I Hate: Serge Lutens Louve

  1. This scent brings out the worst in everyone! 😉
    I was horrified too, when I reviewed it I was unsure if I could trash something so badly, but obviously we have no choice!
    That image is revolting, lol! 🙂

    1. I hope that there are people out there who love and wear this one—I say, Kudos to them, and to each his own! The “Things I Hate” posts give me a chance to demonstrate my perverse streak, while having fun (said the neurotic to the psychotherapist).

      But it really is revolting—if the image was scratch and sniff, it would smell like Louve! 😉

  2. Well, not having tried Louve, I can’t say if it’s as bad as the image you used to describe it, Dee – but I do have to say…I love that picture! 😉

    However, it seems this one was one Serge &Sheldrake’s missed by several thousand miles. Just reading those notes makes my skin recoil in horror. Anything containing large amounts of heliotrope is a very, very bad idea.

    I felt much the same when I tried Rahat Loukhoum. Argh! Total Turkish Terror! Death by Cherry Rosewater Jelly? The Horror of the Harem? (Sounds like the perfect Z movie, doesn’t it? If Russ Meyers directed??? 🙂

    So…would that make Louve a horror movie called…Death By Cherry? The Morello Murder? The Cough Syrup Killah?

    Going on your description, I could think of even more alternative titles, but none fit for polite society! 😉

    1. I like the gangsta twist, “Cough Syrup Killah”!

      The image, if it *were* scratch & sniff, would certainly be more interesting! 🙂

      I feel like I read that someone frequently encountered half-full tester bottles of Louve in department stores, indicating that people intentionally spray it… I should look for that source. It would also be interesting to see what sales are for this one, compared to say… Un Bois Vanille.

      1. Cough Syrup Killah is my favorite moniker, too.

        I think March mentioned the used testers of Louve on the Posse, the day she was talking about eating loukhoum (and gagging).

  3. LOL! Great review. I’ve never tried it, but I’ve never really been into cherry-almond-vanilla fragrances. But, just like you said, now I want to smell this because the bad review was so intriguing 🙂

    1. See what I’m saying! I’ve thought about sending my sample away in a swap or a giveaway, but that perverse streak wants to be able to smell it again…

      It’s almost like getting a nasty cut on your hand then popping it into your mouth. Gross, but instinctive… 😉

  4. Thanks for posting such an unrelentingly negative review Dee, really made me smile. Louve sounds like my idea of perfume hell, though unforunately I’m not even curious enough to try it – thanks for taking one for the team!

    1. Glad you liked reading it Tara!

      I’m a glutton for smells: good, bad, boring, and gross. I will happily report on all the nasty things I encounter in this journey! 🙂

      Hell is an interesting place…

  5. Hilarious. ‘Horrible! Horrible! Horrible!’. Little more need be said.

    I’m curious tho’, dee, to know if you reached for an ‘antidote’ fragrance – something quite different as a contrast to Cerise Criminelle? Or was it a dash to the shower for a full body scrub?

    1. I’ve mentioned that I have a perverse streak? Well, I toughed it out, and wore it as my sleep scent. After the first ten minutes or so, the sillage calms down quite a bit, if I remember corretly, and so, while terrible, it did not actually prevent me from sleeping. 😉

      Via Camerelle is a great antidote fragrance, but I don’t think that I had that one yet in my collection during Louve testing!

      Cerise Criminelle. LOL. That’s what I’m going to refer to it as now. Birgit sure has a way with words!

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